falling apart

She lay there, everything going through her all too familiar.
The pain taking control her entire being, the tears flowing uncontrollably.
The fingers, numb, at the very tips.
She tried rubbing her heart to ease the pain, it won't work.
She cried out, no one hears.
She tried reaching out, no one's there.
The deafeaning silence around her swallows up her cries.
She feels utterly alone and helpless.
Take, take all the pain away.
"Never again, will she allow anyone else to walk into her heart", she tells herself.
She cries herself to sleep, the pain numbing the very senses left in her.

It is not what happened that hurt her.
It is the very fact that he brushed her feelings away like it didn't matter at all.
Just with a word, "Aiyah"
Maybe it never mattered.
Is this all she's worth?
For people to come and go out of her life as they please, leaving her all alone to pick up the broken pieces of her heart.
This is what hurt most.
It hurt even more when the person that matters the most does it..
To just disappear and never be heard of again..
No.. don't do it..
It hurts.. when people choose to ignore, ignore..
Holding on to the very last minute, holding on to the very last hope..
She's holding on..
Don't walk out on her..
Is she not good enough?
Is this all she's worth?

It never really was who he really is..
It never really was what he really is..
All she sees beneath every string of words and every smile; carefully woven together, is a person so ordinary.
A person so ordinary.. A person so ordinary.. that she..
No.. don't push her away like that.. don't..

Don't leave her hanging there.. please..


/There, my beautiful prince from france