scream

How do I emphasize the point that, I am tired? Physically, emotionally, spritually. I don't want to freakin care about anything at all. Can I? I lost my cool today over the phone. The worst part is, I was in school, in the bloody canteen, sitting alone at the table and I started yelling into the phone and started crying. Cheers. And my friends came over with tissue.

What the hell do all of you want me to do? I only got 24 hours a day to spare. And I need to do so MUCH things. This and that and this and that. Spare me! It's not very fun at all to reach home so late every single day, and there will the mother waiting to sing into my ear. I'm going bersek. And one fine day I reach home at 6 thinking, like finally I am home early. Only to realise after stoning for 5 minutes on the sofa that I have something to attend. Goodness. I'm feeling so tried everyday. Everything I do becomes so meaningless and I don't know why the hell am I doing all of this. This is really damn shit.

Yes, and I just realised that it is not that I'm afraid of Wayne, my leader. It's just that I'm afraid of the things he is going to tell me and want me to do.

Anyway, that's besides the point. I should be sleeping now instead of sitting in front of the computer typing all of this rubbish. I'm only venting my frustrations.

Never mind, at least 1T05 still makes my day everyday and I really enjoy working at hagen daz. Which reminds me! On monday! The manager told me I can learn to scoop ice creams. Coolness. It's super hilarious I tell you. The customer came in and ordered Macademia nut and Vanilla. And Don tells me to "slowly scoop". Thus, I began on the very difficult task to scoop Macademia nut ice cream. That ice cream is like a rock I tell you! Strawberry too! Never ever order that if you have a conscience. 10 minutes later, I'm still scooping Mac nut. The customer comes over and said, "Is there something wrong with my ice cream?" I almost wanted to laugh, seriously. I just looked at him and said sorry, please hold on. My right arm has muscle aches all over. I can't wait to go back to work.

Today's terrible! I woke up to find my left neck all stiff. I can't turn my head to the left at all. While talking to my friends, I had to like move my entire body to face them. And I had to run with the stiff neck! Haha. Ah well, it'll go away soon.

Okay, off to bed. No matter what, I'll still hold on. I'm finding back my first love, and of course, live out loud. Haha. I'll be alright. What a quick change in attitude eh. Ah well. Everything will be alright! (:


Live out loud